I notice how tempted I am to think my judgment has no real impact on the one I’m judging. In fact in my worst moments I feel superior to them as I indulge my superficial judgment. It never once occurred to me that my judging of another would present as a stumbling block to them.

I say all of us have a view of ourselves we prefer. Something we say is us. I am this kind of person- a loving person, or a good person or however else you might think of yourself that at times can be self-flattering.

Automatic is the thief of intimacy. Decide first what you would like to share with the one in front of you, converse and listen in such a way that you share in a future worth having with them.